Back home again.

sorry all for not posting, i have been rather busy. but for your information. we are heading back home in a few days.
i am super busy packing. so i am off again. but i shall post when we arrive. 

Done With School

School. One of those things that must be done, and is often taken lightly by those who must go through with it. A awesome little kid once said that after twelve years of school you still don't know anything, and at that point you are supposed to figure out what you want to do with your life and go to school for it. i think that covers it pretty well. i have finally finished tenth grade, so i almost get to figure out what to go to school for. ha ha. getting closer anyhow.

 i am super exited to finally get to do all the work my mom has been wanting me to do but i haven't had time for....i mean  this is exiting!



Have a good day.

Blur of Life

I am sitting now in front of my computer in an odd mood. A fairy tale mood I think some would call it, or artful, or perhaps just contemplative. A mood where it feels right to put together some poetry, and yet one where it is impossible to write an single poem because you are too overwhelmed with the emotion, or the lack of them. A mood where the sun shines brighter, and the grass looks a little greener, and sorrow a little more bitter. Gray is an illusion,  and in between does  not exist. A black and white moment, filled with color. Paradox maybe, but wonderful. God seems a little nearer though He never left, and heaven a tiny more real though I never doubted it. Life is a blur of color, with black and white rules.  yes it is one those moods I am in. Though  the description is lacking.
But where is this leading you are most likely wondering. and with good reason. i doubt you like to sit and read meandering blog posts. I am going somewhere, just be patient.
Well yesterday my mood was a  little less lovely. it was one of those grumpy-the-world-is-going-to-end-today kind of moods. I got over it thankfully.
and the day before i was kinda sad.
The day before i was one of those never dieing optimists.
I watch a movie, and it makes me laugh, read a book that makes me cry.  listen to music that makes me tremble.
Life changes, my moods change. I am ever so human. and I believe we are all to a certain extent. It is what makes waves in lifes ocean. this up and down of emotion. 
Emotion does not show truth. for some days I feel that God is closer, and other days not, but it changes nothing. God is always near.
this just  proves how little one should trust emotion. Moods. So then, what things are truly beautiful? wonderful? make us go 'wow'? if it just leads to another emotion is it worthless?
I believe so. because even the unsaved go 'wow' when they see the Rockie Mountains. But those things can also lead to to a great awe of God. that I think it good. but then you ask, is awe of God simply another emotion? I have been asking the same question, and have not come up with an answer. Perhaps we were made to feel the  emotion of awe towards God? I know not. but I do believe that emotions, for their own sake are worth very little.
But maybe, just maybe God gave us emotions to color life, to show what we feel. Or maybe they are just reaction to life and nothing else.
What are emotions, and where do they lead? why did God give them to us? is it all a crazy hoax? or do they give a better understanding of God? Or do they just deceive us? comment, and tell me what you think!
All this talking, and you never did get an answer. but I did ask the questions.  so comment away. I would love to hear!

Well I am off again to continue my search. fare thee well all. do not get too caught up in the emotions of the moment to forget what we are doing on earth!

Where to Go?

So I will admit, I have been less than generous with my writing lately. I post pictures and leave. But don't feel bad, even my journal has been empty for the past couple months. I guess I have been through a lot, and learned a lot, and needed time to process. I still feel like I have not properly processed everything, but I figure it is time to post anyhow.Even very shortly as to what I am thinking.
Though what to say? But that profound things are simple, sometimes forgotten things. Truth is simple yet unfathomable. We cannot understand God, but He is truth, which is simple, yet God, who is everything,  is not so simple. So everything I learn about God, is both simple, and yet I can not understand it.
 In all this thinking, and reading of the Bible. I have learned much, but yet little can be said about it. For what can be said about a God who created the heavens and the earth? but that He is awesome and all powerful?
so much more, he is loving, just, holy, the beginning of wisdom, never ending, and the list goes on. But as a mere human what can I say? but 'holy, holy, holy is the Lord God almighty' ? and yet it seems that I, and we, are called to say more To what end? The glory of God.  As to what I am to say, that it seems is a life journey. One that is hard, but beautiful.
In this life I am called to follow God to whatever end He has for me. To glorify Him in whatever I do.  That is the bottom line. The rest will flow from that, or so I pray.  It all sounds so simple. and yet it will take my whole life to figure it out.

those are my thoughts in a nutshell.
hope you have a good day.

My Little Bro, True To Form

so i found this picture of kaleb and just had to post it. i laughed so hard. Hope he gave you a laugh too.

Rocket

Like many of you know, kaleb loves to build things. when we were in Palawan kaleb built a bottle rocket launcher, and many many rockets. some with parachutes, some that went fast, some that spun, and many more.

Home Again

we are once again in our home sweet home. what a great feeling. though the first few days have been hard, because in 11 weeks things change.  Kaleb and my favorite mountain biking trail is fenced over, my running trail is gone... all kinds of things.  even so, it has been absolutely great to be home. to do school in my own office, to eat at our own table ect.
 

Ashaway tournament

 so i thought i had posted about the Ashaway tournament long ago. but my great and wonderful mother pointed out that i did not. 

first of all, three days before the tournament i crashed the bike and sprained my thumb. we thought for a while that it was broken, but after having x-rays i know it is/was not. so that was a bummer. but i was able to tape my hand enough to play. though i had no smash, and could only lift from half court. but dispite my injury i got to the quarter finals in both doubles and singles. i lost in doubles to the eventual winner. and in singles to the finalist.both of them were first seed. so that was cool. kaleb lost in second round in singles to the top seed and winner. and in semi finals to the top seed and winner.  but he did very well, and fought hard. almost taking the semi final game in doubles. 

 

Time goes by, and i am left standing

The time in circles go
Just to pass me by
And i am left standing just so
Time will go, dont lie

The leaves from the trees fall
Another poor soul says goodbye
And i am left standing, looking at it all
Time will go, dont lie

The pain, like mountains grows
The earth does sigh
And i am left standing wishing time slow
Time will go, dont lie






the time for blogging has long since passed, and i am left standing. i am sorry. time does speed so. and it is still passing, so i shall have to post longer soon!

have a good evening.

pictures

well, here are some pictures of Kaleb and i trying to learn tricks on a bmx bike... we arent very good yet.  but we are trying to learn.

Biking Movie.

well here it is, our very short biking video. enjoy.

It Almost Turned Out...

 well, time has passed quickly. i told you in the last post we were making a movie. well several things happened to make our movie less then expected.  first being that rich, the guy in yellow shirt had some bad luck. his chain broke the day after my last post. so we did not get the shots done that we had wanted, and spent our time walking home.  the day after that in a practice run i fell off a cliff like thing onto my tail bone, and was unable to ride after that. in fact, i spent till today recovering. i could not sit for the first several days, and even laying hurt for the first while. thankfully i am ok now, and back to my normal self, except a cold. which will soon pass.  but because of the incidents, we had a ton of clips, for random parts of our story line. so we ended up just combining the cool riding parts into a short 5 minute movie, with no story line. a little disappointing, but that is life i guess.

this is rich with his broken chain

me the camera man, just waiting.

doing some deep talking on the strategies of filming. 

 and this was just before Luke's chain broke.  the day before my last  post. 

 and a cool shot of where we ride. or just a tree were we ride.

have a good day all!

Having a Good Time

 the past few days my friends and i were out in the mountains shooting video for a short  mountain biking movie we are making. i got a few good pictures before the rain came.

a few days ago i woke up at 5 am to find that our dog had fallen into our garbage pit. so i climbed into the reeking pit and pushed her out with  the help of my father. it was not a nice experience.  and i have decided that i will not make a career of climbing into garbage. i was leaving the options open, but i have just narrowed my list down a little.

Perhaps We Skip the Title This Time?

well, it seems that my blog keeps getting forgotten, and even when i do post, it is of petty things, and of little interest. i hate to disappoint, but so it will be again. someday, in the near future i hope, i shall do a long post on things of some consequence. but time is once again limited, so this will be but a few pictures.


as you can see, unless you have slow internet and the pictures did not load, that we had a good time making and eating s'mores.  i am sorry i cant spell it. but you can probably guess, the things with gram cracker, cooked marshmallows and chocolate.

My Books

i have written two novellas, and am in the process of writing a novel. if you would like to read one, or all of them, please comment, and i will consider sending it to you. thanks

here are the synopsis's.

To The Rising Sun

(114 pages)

Genre: fiction

After his mother dies, Dustin suddenly finds himself with no home and no job. In desperation he agrees to work for a cruel man in the hopes of getting to Carnam and finding his father. Nothing goes as planned and he gets captured by outlaws and catapulted into a treasure hunt that could change history.

But will the outlaws stop him from finding his father? Can he learn to control his own anger in impossible situations? Will the price he pays to find his father prove be too high?

To Relight the World 

(60 pages)

Genre: fantasy

 When the sun suddenly disappear Bob goes on a search that will change his life.  A search for the switch for the sun, and for truth.

Will he find what he searches for? Or will he be deceived by the lies of the ones before him?

and the novel i am currently writing.  For What Was Lost

Estimated page length: 250 -300

Genre: Fantasy 

With the last of the acient swords in his possesion Fitar is is thrust into an impossible war to free a dying people, and regain the lost art. 

But will his hatred destroy him? or will the Andivins finally succeed and kill all the Nahya?


Copyright 2011 Kevin Barkman