Thursday, June 9, 2011

Done With School

School. One of those things that must be done, and is often taken lightly by those who must go through with it. A awesome little kid once said that after twelve years of school you still don't know anything, and at that point you are supposed to figure out what you want to do with your life and go to school for it. i think that covers it pretty well. i have finally finished tenth grade, so i almost get to figure out what to go to school for. ha ha. getting closer anyhow.

 i am super exited to finally get to do all the work my mom has been wanting me to do but i haven't had time for....i mean  this is exiting!



Have a good day.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Blur of Life

I am sitting now in front of my computer in an odd mood. A fairy tale mood I think some would call it, or artful, or perhaps just contemplative. A mood where it feels right to put together some poetry, and yet one where it is impossible to write an single poem because you are too overwhelmed with the emotion, or the lack of them. A mood where the sun shines brighter, and the grass looks a little greener, and sorrow a little more bitter. Gray is an illusion,  and in between does  not exist. A black and white moment, filled with color. Paradox maybe, but wonderful. God seems a little nearer though He never left, and heaven a tiny more real though I never doubted it. Life is a blur of color, with black and white rules.  yes it is one those moods I am in. Though  the description is lacking.
But where is this leading you are most likely wondering. and with good reason. i doubt you like to sit and read meandering blog posts. I am going somewhere, just be patient.
Well yesterday my mood was a  little less lovely. it was one of those grumpy-the-world-is-going-to-end-today kind of moods. I got over it thankfully.
and the day before i was kinda sad.
The day before i was one of those never dieing optimists.
I watch a movie, and it makes me laugh, read a book that makes me cry.  listen to music that makes me tremble.
Life changes, my moods change. I am ever so human. and I believe we are all to a certain extent. It is what makes waves in lifes ocean. this up and down of emotion. 
Emotion does not show truth. for some days I feel that God is closer, and other days not, but it changes nothing. God is always near.
this just  proves how little one should trust emotion. Moods. So then, what things are truly beautiful? wonderful? make us go 'wow'? if it just leads to another emotion is it worthless?
I believe so. because even the unsaved go 'wow' when they see the Rockie Mountains. But those things can also lead to to a great awe of God. that I think it good. but then you ask, is awe of God simply another emotion? I have been asking the same question, and have not come up with an answer. Perhaps we were made to feel the  emotion of awe towards God? I know not. but I do believe that emotions, for their own sake are worth very little.
But maybe, just maybe God gave us emotions to color life, to show what we feel. Or maybe they are just reaction to life and nothing else.
What are emotions, and where do they lead? why did God give them to us? is it all a crazy hoax? or do they give a better understanding of God? Or do they just deceive us? comment, and tell me what you think!
All this talking, and you never did get an answer. but I did ask the questions.  so comment away. I would love to hear!

Well I am off again to continue my search. fare thee well all. do not get too caught up in the emotions of the moment to forget what we are doing on earth!